Back For Good

Prologue

Trina snuggled against Joy’s shoulder, feeling at peace for the first time in ages. Trina glanced up at Joy from under her lashes. She ran her index finger lightly over the inside of Joy’s wrist and was pleased with the slight tremble her action had invoked.
When their hands linked and their eyes connected, a smile swept over both their faces. It felt like a warm glow spread all over them, like a soft blanket, enveloping them both.
Looking at Trina, Jocelyn realised that she wanted her, and for the first time since their teenage days, she felt whole again. For Jocelyn, this feeling was so wonderful that it didn’t matter what would or could happen tomorrow, she needed to cherish today. A fresh tingle was ignited in her stomach, and even as she brushed the tears that had escaped from her eyes, she could not help saying, “I think I love you.”
The sudden rush of those words left her feeling drained and more emotionally exposed than she had ever felt. Jocelyn dared not look at the beautiful woman in front of her so she dropped her lashes to conceal the vulnerability she felt. She waited with baited breath and then stole a quick glance, as she waited for the response.
With a smile on her face that seemed to be reliving every moment of their past together, Trina said, “I know.”
After a moment, Trina took one of Jocelyn’s hands in hers, with the other raised Jocelyn’s chin, and stared intently into her eyes, “I know you think you love me. At this moment in time, you want me and I think you need me. If fact I know you have love for me, but let us put this all into prospectus. For the past few weeks, you have been on an emotional rollercoaster. First your beloved Nan died, with you having to come back home to face your family for the first time, since the night you left. ” Trina paused.
Jocelyn had experienced more emotion in one week since coming home than she had in all the years in Sunderland. It was as if she had been emotionally stunted for those years. Every emotion she had ever felt tumbled out with an intensity that scared her.
“I’m fine with all that now.” Jocelyn stated.
Are you?” Asked Trina, “I remember your little ways when things are troubling you. Like how you nibble on the skin by your nail on your index finger when you’re trying to forget about something.” She paused again for a second. “Just like you are doing now.”
“For goodness sake Trina, I cannot forget that night all those years ago. The betrayal I felt from everyone. But I am a different person now. I have closure on that night.”
“Do you?” Trina asked intently, “You are beginning to have closure when it comes to your parents, and what your father tried to do to you.”
“You mean tried to rape me.” Jocelyn stated. “You can say it you know.”
“Yes. Okay.” Trina agreed, “When your father tried to rape you. But you now know what was behind why it happened.” She paused, and then continued, “And I still think you should go to the police.”
Jocelyn shook her head, “As I said before, it will be his word against mine. And so many years have gone by. Anyway who would believe that my father, or the person I believed to be my father, would try something like that, to try to rape me. My mother certainly didn’t.” she sighed, “and she still doesn’t.”
“She might deep down in her sub-conscious. But if the person you loved was accused of something, wouldn’t you try to defend them.”
“I honestly don’t know. It would depend on the seriousness of it.”
“Exactly. He is her husband. Wouldn’t you believe him first and then start to question.”
“I might.” Jocelyn conceded. “But it would still be his word against mine.”

“You now know that the brain tumour changed his personality.” Trina replied. “That would give you credence. Surely?”

“Yeah. Right.” Jocelyn said, and shook her head.

“And second the bombshell your Mother dropped on you.”

Jocelyn was still shaking her head. “I still can’t believe my Mother had a fling with a bloke called Richard Hendon so soon after they were married. I now know that’s why my father treated me differently than Duncan. That’s why he abused me physically and mentally because I wasn’t his child and he hated that fact.”

Trina squeezed Joy’s hands, “You’re dealing with that now though, aren’t you?”

Jocelyn breathed deeply, “Does anyone truly deal with it? I’m sure it will continue to affect me over the years. And because the issue with Dad, I haven’t been able to ask my Mum why she had the fling. Was he hurting her as well as me?”